Blog: Hipster RunOff

Beyonce BB! Ur srsly the best artist since Whitney Houstons! Except u didn't marry a guy who did so much coke and meth that his teeth fell out! U married a billionaire, bb! How does Beyonce ALREADY look so amazing even though she just pooped out a child from her vajay? Ur HONESTLY the MOST beautiful prson in the world. Who is ur stylist and do they do any charity pro bono work for poor ppl like me to get free makeovers? OMG! Ur BB looks AMAZING, bb! I can TELL that it has UR good [...]

https://twitter.com/#!/blobtow er/status/167307020444246016 We fight against the Corrupt Indie Machine 4 u. This week, a battle was launched against Carles by Justin Vernon . He stood against Independent Indie Media. He stood against The Indie Truth. He stood against indie free speech and the Progressive Alt Blogosphere. Many speculated that he was a part of the Corrupt Indie Machine . Perhaps he has seen the light, taking to #Twitter to issue a formal apology 2 Carles . He said, "sorry CRLS." [...]

http://www.nme.com/news/madonn a/61968 M.I.A.'s life continues to unravel after the Super Bowl. Earlier this week, she was exposed as a deadbeat mom . Now it seems as though she is being shunned by Madonna. Just a few weeks ago, MIA was all like 'big thangs are poppin, yall!' But now, Madonna has basically said that M.I.A. is a stupid tween who ruined the positive vibes of her show by flipping off the camera just to make herself 'a national talking point', even though no1 even really cared, it just fueled [...]

http://tmagazine.blogs.nytimes .com/2012/02/09/a-star-is-born -and-scorned/?hp The New York Times is allegedly one of the 'last authentic content farms' in the game, writing long 'pieces' with serious words that 'sound important and authoritative', which is why they NAILED IT by calling Lana Del Rey 'a skinnier Adele.' It's a great moment for American alt music journalism, sticking it to 'the goddamn British' and hefty mainstreamers who <3 Adele. Curvaceous and pretty in a dress, she brims with catchy songs, all a bit retro, ironic and modern. Without straying too far [...]

Congrats 2 #JimmyJangler! U jimmy jangled ur way straight into the hearts of HIPSTER RUNOFF readers in the Vally's Day Contest ! More winners coming soon maybe! Yay! #Evry1isAWinner, if u rlly think abt it. 'Give the Gift of Carles ' to the person who u authentically <3. http://www.iamcarles.com http://www.iamcarles.com http://www.iamcarles.com http://www.iamcarles.com Order before Saturday Feb 11 at 1 PM EST, and u will get GUARANTEED [...]

Tyler the Creator is some buzz rapper that ppl think is 'kewl', but I figured he would have imploded in the same James Blake bubble era that he was hyped in. I guess rap is a more viable mainstream option than drone bass music. I really know know anything about rap, nor do I understand why I should appreciate it, so I don't really think he is cool or anything, but I guess if I were some 'swag tween', I would listen 2 him and go to Odd Future popup shops in the greater Los Angeles [...]

Cults has some new video for "D'ya know what I mean?", and I am not sure if it is documentary-style, or if it is a high-budget love story involving 3rd degree burns to the entire body of Cults lead singer Brian Oblivion . If it is real, all we can do is #pray for the speedy recovery of Brian Oblivion during this difficult time. GRAPHIC PHOTO [via face burns] Do u know if these r for real? Will he play on stage with them? OMG! [...]

http://www.gq.com/style/wear-i t-now/201202/retro-style-fashi on-sleigh-bells-photos-gq#slid e=1 Sexi Lexi Krauss's personal brand is truly 'making the leap', as she morphs from 'indie sex icon' to 'mnstrm sex icon.' She truly has it all. Mad record sales on her debut album without backlash buzz, appearing on SNL on Feb 18 to 'rectify' the Bon Iver and Lana Del Rey performances, and is truly The Indiesphere's Most Desirable Woman. Oh Lexi BB... What I would give 2 be 'other dude' in Sleigh Bells [...]

It seems as though BUZZ BANDS have FINALLY made it into the American lexicon of jargon dictionary cultural awareness zeitgeist mass media crossover into the mainstream. Or there is just 'some indie bro' who works there, and he sees dumb categories 'go viral'. There is also potentially 'some genuine indie fan girl' who works there and she 'genuinely' used the word buzzbands. Other ppl think that there might be a 'cool dad' who just wanted to buzz some bands, get some pictures of TV screens 'going viral' as if any1 gives a damn abt Jeopardy as a culturally relevant institution. [...]

Topics: Bon Iver Topics: [...]

http://www.pitchfork.com/news/ 45357-metallica-pick-best-coas t-modest-mouse-fucked-up-titus -andronicus-for-their-festival / Best Coast was 'hand picked' to play some festival that Metallica curated. 'Who cares?' Well, Pitchfork came up with a GREAT angle to make it interesting. Recently, Best Coast 's Bethany Cosentino tweeted that Metallica TOTALLY EFFING SUCKED [via that crappy album that every1 said sucked, "Lulu". Haha, remember when Bethany Cosentino called the Metallica/Lou Reed album "the worst thing I've ever heard" ? That apparently didn't stop Metallica from hand-selecting Best Coast for their new [...]

Skrillex has it all. Mad record sales, mainstream fame, alt fame, adoring fans who will go see him DJ for any price, and approaching one million Twitter followers. But now it seems like he truly has it all now that he has been bronoodling with Mr. Belding [via Saved By the Bell fallen human meme]. Is Mr. Belding 'addicted 2 VIP' and 'partying hard'? Has Mr. Belding always partied and hung out with kids who looked alt? Is he addicted to 'bitches', 'partying' and 'the [...]

Now that Lana Del Rey has sold 'mad albums', we begin trying to figure out 'who are her fans'? It seems like she will have to form an official name for her tribe, similar to Lady Gaga 's monsters. Do u have a name for her fans? So far the best thing I can think of is "Lana Del R8trz." At a recent in in-store signing at one of the last authentic record stores in America that hasn't closed yet, Amoeba Records, Lana Del Rey 's fans WENT CRAZY for her. It seems like [...]

Link: http://music-mix.ew.com/2012/0 2/08/lana-del-rey-born-to-die- album-sales/ Lana Del Rey 's album Born To Die was widely panned by the peons of the Corrupt Indie Machine . However, it seems like she 'effing killed it', using the 'tank on SNL' marketing strategy 2 cruise her way to the #2 spot in America. She sold 77k albums in the United States. People constantly debate whether the phrase, "All publicity is good publicity," actually has any credence, but in the case of Lana Del Rey , the [...]

It is hard 2 go thru a tough time Sometimes u need the support of #hashtags so that u don't feel alone on the internet When every1 is #cyberbullying and #slutshaming u U truly feel alone Introducing the #PrayerWatch2k12: A Candlelight Vigil 4 Carles Plz #pray4carles and ur message of <3 and support will be SHOWCASED at the top of HIPSTERRUNOFF dot com. This is a dark time, and we need all we can help against the [...]

Madonna BB! Oh no! Is that ur pussy lip that I see while ur doing an AMAZING flip? U DEFANATELY have been hitting the gym, going to ZUMBA classes, haven't u? I LOVED ur Super Bowl performance except for when that BROWN LADY flipped me off for NO GOOD REASON . That always happens to me when I'm driving! I hate people with road rage! I honestly just wanted to eat my Frito Pie made with Doritos IN PEACE, but NOOO. That lady had to ruin it with her middle finger! UGH I'm tired of people [...]

Zooey BB! Who is the mystery man? I LOVE LOVE LOVE Lou Alcindor! I used to watch him play hoopball ALL the time! But then my dad would tell me that I should GET OUT OF THE WAY while he was watching the game and GET A JOB. Ugh. I hate sports because they remind me of how my dad loved sports more than he loved me. :-( #sadbuttrue I love watching u on FOX network EVERY week. I wanna get my hair cut like u zoZo! I'm gonna take a pic of u into [...]

The New York Knicks are a franchise that is in serious peril. After luring high priced free agents Carmelo Anthony and Amere Stoudemire, head coach Mike D'Antoni has failed to find a point guard that could run his system of organized chaos. It seems like they have turned to NBA-journeyman and Brooklyn author/poet Tao Lin in order to save the franchise. Lin has been putting up great numbers in his first two games. Going nowhere all season without a real point guard, the Knicks turned to Lin on Saturday [...]

https://twitter.com/#!/lancear mstrong/status/166693131562127 360 The war of Twitter words between Carles and Bon Iver continues, but now, famous indie celebrity Justin Vernon has acquired the support of Tour De France winner Lance Armstrong. It seems as though Carles has truly been backed into a lonely corner of the internet against the fame and power of celebrities like Justin Vernon and Lance Armstrong. Lance Armstrong is an Austin resident and long-time fan of indie music, particularly in the cool dad genre. Armstrong is actually probably one of the coolest dads [...]

http://www.nydailynews.com/gos sip/m-i-a-splits-fiance-benjam in-bronfman-family-scene-artic le-1.1018258 M.I.A. truly believed that the Super Bowl was going to be her personal 'launch party.' Now, it seems like her life has truly taken a turn for the worst. First, she might be responsible for paying the FCC fine for her Super Bowl middle finger . Now, the spotlight is shining bright on her, looking to expose SECRETS and GOSSIP about her personal life. It seems as though she has 'separated from her fiance', Benjamin Bronfman. She no longer has billionaire backing, and must make a name [...]