Blog: Our Kitchen Sink

Michael Squints Palledorous walked a little taller that day. And we had to tip our hats to him. He was lucky she hadn't beat the CRAP out of him. We wouldn't have blamed her. What he'd done was sneaky, rotten, and low... and cool. Not another one among us would have ever in a million years even for a million dollars have the guts to put the moves on the lifeguard. He did. He had kissed a woman. And he had kissed her long and good. We got banned from the pool forever that day. But every time we walked [...]

As everyone is very well aware an ornery tornado touched down in Brooklyn yesterday, surely putting a damper on several poetry readings and some bridge and tunnel kids plans for the weekend. As with the internet comes footage of two overly dramatic hipsters reacting to the weather phenomenon. WON'T SOMEONE THINK OF ALL OF OUR MCSWEENEY'S THAT ARE GOING TO BE RUINED!?! *cue the remixes. Related posts: Is it Weird That I Thought the Facebook "Color" Updates Were About Sex Toys? [...]

The one and only Michael Jordan graces this years cover of NBA 2K11 where players can reenact some of His Airness' greatest moments. And remember, never eat sushi in Utah because it's landlocked. ( via ) Related posts: The 46 Greatest Logo's of All Time I feel like I'm Don Draper at a Sterling Cooper... The Top 10 Shots in Chicago Bulls History Ah, the glory days. At some point you have [...]

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia returns for its sixth season tonight. Rather than celebrate with kitten mittens, here's a clip that pretty much sums up the show for anyone who has never seen The Gang... gets raped murdered mutilated Related posts: Must Have of the Day: The Dick Towel I've gotta get behind any product that's endorsed by Mac... Must Have of the Day: The Fast Food Mafia Check out Andrew Shirley's re-imaging [...]

The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo is the next big remake to hit Hollywood thanks to David Fincher plucking up the year old movie that was originally a Swedish release. I figured it warranted a Netflix queue position that finally made it to the top like a fat kid chasing a butterfly up a steep incline. And... Terrific movie. Well acted. Great adaptation. Terrible (spoiler). A couple scenes in that movie made me squirm, and I've got the tolerance of a sorority girl in Champagne, Illinois. This got me thinking, what [...]

Windy City artiste Pose links up with LRG once again for a artistic PANDAdemic. Artist Driven with Pose | New York from LRG on Vimeo . Related posts: Must Have of the Day: Pose x Augor x LRG Collabo T's Noah Banks visits the City of Angels and silicone to... Pose x LRG Pose teams up with LRG for a collaboration that jumps... RUMBLE [...]

In anticipation for his fall tour which hits 30+ dates, Mayer Hawthorne unleashes a freebie for all the broke folks out there. Download: Mayer Hawthorne "No Strings" Related posts: Download: Snoog Dogg "Gangsta Luv" (Mayer Hawthorne G-Mix) Mayer Hawthorne puts a laid back spin on the radio... Download: Mayer Hawthorne "I Need You" Mayer Hawthorne explains the story behind this record: "I met... [...]

The Italian creation dubbed The Love Mattress boasts a removable portion of bedding that allows more less cushion for the pushin'. Somehow I'm guessing that this Love Mattress is going to be really popular with that fatties who have no more room in their bedside tables for all the Charleston Chews and Butterfingers. No related posts.

EXT. MIDDLE SCHOOL - DAY A listless TEENAGER with a shaggy haircut, oversized Starter Jacket, graphic t-shirt depicting Bugs Bunny and Taz as Mac Daddy and Daddy Mac respectively, and a pair of Karl Kani blue jeans waits listlessly outside of school waiting for the bell to ring. He is anything but wiggity wiggity whack. That was me circa 1993. An annoying as holy hell teenager draped in every single gang color imaginable looking for doubles of Toni Kukoc's rookie card and my [...]

Bar.sex.ual 1. A college-age girl who kisses other girls in bars and clubs, usually for attention and the approval of men. A BARSEXUAL girl only kisses girls in places that charge a cover. How I've managed to walk God's green earth for this long without knowing what a barsexual is makes me feel like a geriatric person who was just introduced to twitter. @myunderpants THERE'S SHIT ON YOU Thanks to the beauty of the internet I quickly read up on barsexual [...]

Teaser trailers have been floating around the interwebs for the last few months toying with Kenny Power's imminent return to the mound. Finally we get a good look at a bad hombre as he heads South of the border. Trailer Related posts: Trailer: Four Lions I posted a little teaser trailer about Four Lions a... Trailer: Dexter Season 4 Saying I'm excited for the upcoming [...]

Let's have a toast for the douchebags. Let's have a toast for the assholes. Let's have a toast for the scumbags, everyone that I know. Let's have a toast for the jerk offs. Download: Kanye West feat. Pusha T "Runaway" Related posts: Download: Kanye West feat. Common + Kid Cudi + Pusha T + Big Sean "G.O.O.D. Friday" Technology issues are a motherfucker. G.O.O.D. day, G.O.O.D. night. Download:... [...]

Chances are that if you Google "Linda Cohen" or "Suzy Kolber" there aren't going to be pictures solely of their jugs or Bristol booties. Chances are if you Google Ines Sainz, the Mexican reporter mired in controversy , there are. And boy are we glad. Does anyone know how to say sexual harassment in espanol? Related posts: Sprinter Removes Breast Implants...to Go Faster Star hurdler Jana Rawlinson has [...]

Chances are that if you Google "Linda Cohen" or "Suzy Kolber" there aren't going to be pictures solely of their jugs or Bristol booties. Chances are if you Google Ines Sainz, the Mexican reporter mired in controversy , there are. And boy are we glad. Does anyone know how to say sexual harassment in espanol? Related posts: Sprinter Removes Breast Implants...to Go Faster Star hurdler Jana Rawlinson has [...]

You've gotta respect a musical artist who wears a mask and puts a hot girl on his album cover. He's like one part superhero and one part Larry Flynt. Be sure to check out all of the electro goodness HERE . Related posts: Download: Hey Champ "Winner's Circle" Chicago electro/pop trio, Hey Champ, put on their remix hat...

There comes a time in every man's life where he's set in what kind of females churn his butter. Some like Amazonians. Some like pygmies. Others like tattooed and hairy Armenian women whose oral talents rival that of a Harvard debate team. To spit or to swallow...that is the question. Perhaps I'm a late bloomer because recently I've been drawn to red heads like a moth to a flame. When I was younger these pasty Chucky dolls were terrifying to me. The freckles. The constant need to apply sun tan lotion. The feared and [...]

Technology issues are a motherfucker. G.O.O.D. day, G.O.O.D. night. Download: Kanye West feat. Common + Kid Cudi + Pusha T + Big Sean "G.O.O.D. Friday" ( via ) Related posts: Download: Kanye West x Common x Kid Cudi x Big Sean x Consequence "Whatever you Want" The obligatory G.O.O.D. music posse cut that for some reason... Download: Kid Cudi feat. Kanye [...]

No Regard For Human Life put together a mixtape for LeBron James as if this was a John Hughes movie and the breakup had no chance of being saved by slap bracelets or front yard symphonies. Le sigh! Related posts: Lebron James Tells Fans To Seek Title Not Chalupa's The playoffs are here. And Lebron James had some... More Than A Game [...]

I'm a lover of all music, but especially of that genre dubbed "slippedonepassedthegoalie" which is said to be a combination of soul, funk, and Boone's Farm. If you're looking for an unwanted pregnancy, look no further than these golden oldens. Sam Cooke "Bring it on Home to Me" Arguably the greatest song in the history of music also makes women ovulate quicker than a leaky faucet drip at an apartment building where the slumlord speaks Swahili. Amy Winehouse "Cupid" [...]

If you're not keeping up with ESPN's 30/30 series you're probably watching the Kardashians....thus making you a powder puff and a sissy. Last night's installment featured the unique bond forged between Mike Tyson and Tupac Shakur leading up to Pac's untimely demise after a title fight in Vegas. The latter featured people laughing and pointing at the youngest Kardashian's rumpelstiltskin. Related posts: Mike Tyson Documentary - Trailer James Toback's in-depth documentary feature about the bonkers life of... [...]