At first this sounds like a rejected Beyonce album track. Then it sounds like some drunk bitch swigging cough syrup and missing her intro. THEN it suddenly sounds fucking amazing and i don't really know why. Maybe cause I got distracted by her tits or lipstick or something. Rhyming 'arrogant' and 'Marilyn' isn't what I learnt during my degree but I'm pretty sure Brianna is balling whilst i'm eating Tesco value soup for lunch, so go die Portsmouth University. There's loads of chat about Nicki Minaj dropping a [...]
I'm not using the term Femcee - it sounds like thrush cream. But we all know things are poppin off for Iggy and Azealia right now in a global style. I'm pretty smug to say Milk Teeth interviewed Azealia Banks yonkers ago, you can re-read the lol-filled business here: $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ and since then she's swollen in status like a magical tumour. Here's her latest creations, showing off those sparklin vocal chords and proving that there's more to female artists than Lana Del Ray mumbling through those blowjob lips: Similarly Iggy Azalea is spreading like STD gossip [...]
This blog is about music and bitchin MAINLY. But there are other gorjus aspects to my lifestyle that i know you're all hungry to devour. SO in case any music aggregation sites have a pop about me going a bit freestyle, here's some musak to listen to whilst you read about my quest to become a fckn pro-anna skeleton like my hero Chloe Mafia (see above) The mix is a live recording of fresh audio-Calpol courtesy of my favourite producer Clams Casino performing at SOM last year. Recorded off the boards direct to Ableton, and [...]
How i can I leave before I dropping this murky perfect video on you, like an infected tiny roofie in your mulled wine <3 Just call me Mrs Claus baybee (and supply me with a £40 Anne Summers voucher so i can buy the slutty-santa dress) "Kidnap a vampire and drain all his fuckin veins Wolf Grey Jordans, use his intestines for the strings Snatch up Rihanna and throw her in front of a fuckin train Sniff a fucking unemployment line of cocaine Tie Lil B up to a full tank of [...]
Before I go home to the Midlands and get mocked for being a vegetarian, teach my cousins how to vodka-tampon and sob into my teenage bed because my Dad threw away my old diaries - I thought I'd patronise you with some HAWT TIP OFFS for 2012. I'm going to make this really brief and then record an extended video entry on NYE when I'm 2 bottles of Archers down (and i wonder why my tooth fell out this week) rambling about how slutty-cooking is the new dubstep, and how Maxwell D and me nearly got it owwwnnn thanks to Twitter and the #garagememories [...]
Soz I've been a bit quiet - I spend my days lighting cough syrup infused sceneted candles and being led around on a jager-drip like this: I have also spent a chunk of time shouting at the shitty small TV we have (cause we're paying for Sky, even though our screen is 2cm big) whenever lesbians come on the screen, yelling "PLEASE DON'T THINK ALL GAYS ARE LIKE THIS" i.e Don't Tell The Rancid Bride and 4am L-Word repeats. Obz most lesbo's I know wear padded Primark coats [...]
When I was like 13 or 14 I took a weekend off spending my pocket money on watermelon 20:20/B&H and went shoplifting in Our Price in the Leamington Spa Royal Priors shopping centre. It was a shit place to be with any kind of human hindsight, but to my naive Sun-In stained head it was retail mecca. I pocketed a few cassette singles, probably Brandy and Monica and maybe Joe 'Stutter' and then spent actual $$ on a track called Nursery Rhymes by Iceberg Slimm. I played it loads on my bulky ugly stereo and my Mom banned it from [...]
I'm glowing (-_-) the first part of my UKGarage series went down harder than Kim Kardash with a webcam. Here's the second, this time I'm looking at the moulding and sculpting of UKG and speaking to Noodles, a geezer who made things happen and is still pushing the right directions. No doubts about it, the birth and 2stepping explosion of UKGarage was a big scene in the UK, it created and branded something of our own that shaped summers and life soundtracks for everyone that wasn't listening to Moby on mini-disc waxing lyrical about Pascha, or painting their stubby nails [...]
After my way too passionate audio-affair with All Saints when i was an 11 year old, I kinda knew there was something brighter and better out there, something that didn't include the extended dance edition of 'Never Ever'. If it was 2011 That thing would have been Google images, which would have extended my interest levels for as long as picturingthe Appleton twins macking out lasts.... But nah, i found a name for the music that always made my pre-pollution heart beat a bit faster, the guy in Leamington Spa Fopp told me to listen to 'Battle' by [...]
This is the dead classy kinda debut release that makes me shuffle about feeling inadequate and nervy. Jessie Ware is like a Leon wrap in a lunch break full of 99p ham sandwiches. SBTRKT knows, Sampha knows, Joker knows, Jamie XX knows... she's got a golden buffet of musical support webbed around her, and this new single 'Strangest Feeling' is everything it should be. I ain't saying anymore cause the witty percentage of my brain has been melted by acne paranoia and general fatigue. Send me scented candles and coconut water plz.
I took time outta my hard-pressed Sunday drinking rum&apple whilst dredging YouTube for WWF Women Wrestlers, to listen to one track on repeat and repeat and repeat - introducing Azealia Banks aka Miss Bank$. I've got huge portions of time for girls with dollar signs in their names that look like a T.L.C houseparty, so hunted her down for an interview. Barbiez get prepped - this gurl is gonna take things over swear down. Milk Teeth: I got introduced to your music earlier today and i'm totally in hard-love, Miss Bank$ , you [...]
Mac Miller isn't old enough to consider fucking, well, he is, but only after 5 jagerbombs and a complicated moral bypass (i had the surgery, believe me it's SO worth it) but he makes breezy smoked out hip-hop with injections of The Cool Kids and A Tribe Called Quest, it sounds smooth like a mouthwash-bong. Plus he hangs with Wiz IRL, which instantly makes him likeable and one step closer to Amber Rose who is deffo old enough to think/dream about fucking. Loads of you already know about him, but calm yourself and the 'I WAS REPPIN MAC BACK IN [...]
This is the biggest teddy bear of remix I've heard since Hudson Mohawke ejaculated all over Jamie Woon. I love it - i wanna date it and make little fimo sculptures of it's chubby face, then swap shoes with it and share a bubble bath and not even mind it trying to penetrate me whilst we spoon innocently watching Take Me Out. Mj Cole has cutsied up Wretch 32 (who btw is one of the nicest, well mannered fellas in the world) with this sugar dose of 2step mixing. The lesbian who does the vocals sounds even more [...]
London is bleak right now. My housemate and I spent last night listening to Robyn as I fake tanned and then watched Dragons Den. We heard a whole heap of sirens and the odd group-chant, but you don't fuck with the Turkish guys that run our local shop and they just lit a fag and refused to close up so everything seemed safe y'know. Obviously I'm a dark bitch that loves to make you squirm with disgust at the details of my shallow Kardashian obsessed life, but i'll try and show a bit of positivity (and maybe a [...]
whenver i see Katy B dashin about in her basic Topshop boot cut jeans and shrunk-washed Rinse Fm t-shirt i just wanna wrap her in a fleece slanket and make her watch King of the Hill boxsets with me and drink Malibu. If we make out, that's cool, but it's not urgent cause she's just that slightly harsh pikey from year 9 with a tuff as fukk big sister and an Ellesse backpack with a mobile phone pouch on the strap. She has got good tits though TBF. i LOVE Katy B's voice and music and [...]
I LIKE GIFS AND SPLIFFS here's me and my DJ significant other @BradDykes playing Tweet 'Oops (oh my)' at JailBait in Brighton. I was drip fed Glenns vodka through sheer abuse, which i'm allergic to, which in turn forces me to remove clothes and only play Dr Dre 'I just wanna fuck you' on repeat until I vomit over my fake tan and am forcibly removed by the same security man (Andre) and get £10 taken out of my fee for being an absolute prick. I made it into a GIF as [...]
This is Delilah, that holy miss from the only bearable track Chase and Status have produced in forever 'Time' - the emo one that pussyole's like me love to listen to on repeat cause i'm a sucka for a fit gurl with fit vocals. At Radio 12s Big Weekend this year, it was the only golden moment of the whole 2 days and made the gross weather gross atmosphere and gross temperature 5% less puke-worthy. She's put together a HOT new track, splicing about with Chaka Khan samples, with Balistiq who are fresh2death and super nice too. I interviewed them for [...]
My job is F2F - one thing I recently managed to pull off without killing myself or setting anyone on fire was the 1Xtra Soundclash photobooth. We stashed it in the corner by the bar (£4 for w WKD btw - fuck off) and waited for the vain and wasted to clog it full of tit shots and stush faces. It worked, everything was QR coded and it got bare love from the Soundclash DJ's including Mista Jam, Vernon Kay, Gemma Cairney, Sarah-Jane Crawford, Bailey, Twin B, Vis, Charlie Sloth, plus Mz Bratt, Black the Ripper, Jamal SBTV.... and loads [...]
"Fuck that new girl that's been in your bed and when you're in her, I know I'm in your head" is it legal to wetdream JoJo now? She's older than the youngest Kardashian so that's a nod. Plus she's covered and spinned Drake's 'Marvin's Room' which dropped last week. Now this is CONTRO and you're gonna unfollow me on Twitter and cyber-bully me with angry emoticons >:_( BUT. I like it better than Drake's version, I think it's wayyyy better. (Had to avoid writing 'I'm just saying Jo Jo's done betttttter) it has some deep [...]
I've been waiting for Roxxxane to drop something big and ca$h heavy for a l-o-n-g time - remember when we gave her the Game Over gold star here ? Well now something more solid than Romeo&Harvey has been planted with 'Tear'. The production is massive, the video is a storm of tense 'ard vocals and Roxxxane is shining. She's got so much streaming her way, WATCH ITTT "i'm a Gemini so i've got another inside" CO SIGN THAT BBY Fresh from Context MC is the follow up to [...]
Milk Teeth
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Childish Gambino - "Heartbeat" (Official Music Video)
James Blake – Live Album
Mux Mool
