
I think Phoebe hit the nail on the head last night when she told me, "Never pick things up at night." This was while I was on my way home from Newport Beach, where I purchased a new turntable from somebody I found on Craigslist. I'm not lying when I say this, because I've never quite had this sensation before...but I'm pretty sure the guy I bought the record player from wanted to kill and eat me. If that had happened, I would have held all of you responsible. The night started out innocently with a phone call [...]